Theme/subtheme | |
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A. Physical or emotional impact on intimacy | |
A1. Physical impact on intimacy: “I had | |
• Difficulty with sexual activity due to gout flare pain, gout attack makes it impossible; Your whole body is to break in half if you try to be intimate”; • Lack of movement due to joint pain during gout flare; • No feeling, can’t feel sex during a flare; • Inability to maintain personal hygiene, making people feel less attractive about self; • All body pain, which made even touch to the body painful; • To lie down in the quiet room in the bed; • Inability to perform sexually when in pain; • Less desire to have sex; • Diarrhea and gas with colchicine, which was embarrassing during intimacy with spouse; • Felt sleepy with narcotic pain medication; and • Sleeping separate (in different beds or different rooms) from the spouse during a flare, for the fear of pain exacerbation with light touch.” | |
A2. Emotional impact on intimacy: “I felt | |
• Emotional stress due to joint pain; • Exposing I was vulnerabilities to spouse, which had a negative effect; • Spouse wasn’t aggressive towards intimacy due to my gout; • Emotional vulnerability due to “male ego” and inability to be intimate during a gout flare; • Embarrassed when my husband had to help me with personal hygiene; • Depression, anger, frustration interfering with intimacy, gout makes you mean; • That I stayed in a bad mood; • Inferior due to gout; • Depressed due to no inability to be intimate due to gout; • Emotional fragility, with my first attack, I cried like a baby; and • Gout impacted sexual desire.” | |
B. Disability/dependence Interfering with Social Life and Intimacy | |
B1. Disability: “I had | |
• The inability to keep up physically with boy-friend in routine and recreational activities; • Physical disability, requiring the use of assistive devices; • Difficulty in helping wife with household chores during flare; and • The need to adjust life around the attack.” | |
B2. Physical dependence: “I had | |
• Total dependence on wife during a flare; • To depend on my husband/significant other; • Hospitalization for the severe pain, which was later diagnosed as a gout flare; • My spouse carry me around the house and up and down the stairs; • Gout flares that kept me in bed two to three times a month; • Inability to walk at all; and • to use crutches to walk when the flare hit.” | |
B3. Limitation of Social Life activities: “I had difficulty | |
• With the ability to plan events; • Going to football games or movies together with spouse; • Doing usual social activities, such as going to the bar, or a concert; • Going places due to gout pain; • Interacting with peers; • Missing church events such that spouse had to go alone; • And had to quit going to the church due to gout; • Maintaining the routine of going out for dinner due to gout pain, “a lot of times, everything stops”; and • Driving to important events due to flares, and my spouse had to drive.” | |
C. Trust issues/ understanding by spouse or significant other: “I noted | |
• Less understanding with my spouse; • Partner not taking time to understand how gout affected me; • That if the relationship was new, spouse wouldn’t understand how gout was affecting me; and • That gout made me ill-tempered with my spouse.” | |
D. Problem with Self-image and perception by partner | |
• “When I first had gout 15 years ago, I was in late 30s and I could not walk, holding on to walls; I could not drive – there was nothing going on; and • I was in a relationship and could not carry on the relationship; I couldn’t stand a sheet on my foot.” | |
E. Restricted Diet/Food choices negatively impacting the relationship | |
• “It affects a lot; • Food choices change – no shellfish, seafood; and • Places we could not eat and go out due to gout.” | |
F. Treatment-related Financial Burden stressing relationship | |
• “Gout affected income and us; • It’s stressful for the relationship; and • Medications are expensive even with insurance.” | |
G. Emotional Impact- communication, personality changes, effect on self or spouse | |
• “Women are nurturers and she could not resolve how to help me with my pain; • She wanted to find a solution for me, just couldn’t; and • She goes with me to the doctor – She is my snitch to the doctor; we had quite a different view-point about treatments, now we have a shared viewpoint: For years, I declined any medication treatment, I doctored myself- you know you go on the Internet, self-diagnose and treat yourself; it was a difficult obstacle for me to overcome.” | |
H. Not in a relationship currently/ No or positive effect on relationship | |
• "I don’t have a personal relationship; • If you are in a spiritual relationship, you can still cope; and • I knew its limitations before getting mine; It drew us closer together." |